ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
one might say we're banned from that church
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
And then he peed in my hair
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