I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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