I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I believe in your delicious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize