Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
