Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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