I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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