Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
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