one two three fourrrrnication!
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
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i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
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I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
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