I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize