did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
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