i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
