No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
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