girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Randomize
