I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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