i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
