Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
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