hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Randomize
