I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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