Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
