I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I can't trust your balls anymore.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize