they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
