we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
