can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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