hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
