ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
