Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?