Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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