oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Randomize