apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
