think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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