Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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