his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
