fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
