I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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