Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Buhtt sex?
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Walk of Shame today included voting.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
Randomize
