I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
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