AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
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it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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