remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
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My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
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I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
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