i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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