my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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