At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Randomize
