if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
i just sent this text using only my big toe
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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