i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
