no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize
