I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
