Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
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It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
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