I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Randomize
