Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
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