Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Randomize