In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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