im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize