Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
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